#Homefront the revolution characters free#
The word "sandbox" implies carefree entertainment free of the restrictions of linear game design, and the word "shooter" implies that the bang-bangs will be going into the man-mans. It's a sandbox shooter in the inevitable "liberate all the districts" mold, but I wonder if as the medium has evolved, we have rather lost touch with the essential purpose of the sandbox shooter. No such luck, but Backyard: The Renovation is a sandbox game, which are at an increased risk of buggering up, so there was always the chance of buggering itself to death at some point. And whenever it happened, every single time I would cross my little fingers and say a little prayer, "Please, crash! Go on, you pussy. "Is that all you've got, Yahtzee? Do you really give that much of a shit about audio mixing?" No, I bloody don't! Nobody does! So imagine how godawful the audio mixing has to be that I consider it important to mention! I was being talked to by an NPC on our way down a corridor and my fucking footstep sounds was drowning out his speech! It was like my shoes were trying to do the Bane voice! But even if you're the kind of biblical messiah who can forgive the sin of bad audio mixing, the framerate was so awful I could practically hear the clicking of the joints of the old man turning the crank, and the game freezes for five seconds every single time it autosaves, like you're trying to watch a Youtube video on an oil rig. This is the worst audio mixing that I've ever heard in what purports to be a finished game. Homefront: The Refrigerator has technical issues the way the Waffen-SS had a few bad apples. So, with our investment in the struggle completely not established, the game finally gets going, with a shuddering cough, and a little squirt of piss into its pants. Oh, but the evil lurking behind the friendly façade of the occupying force is revealed in the intro sequence, as our character is interrogated by a sadistic torturer before escaping and rejoining the resistance, who mistake us for a spy and takes us to be interrogated by their sadistic torturer, and I guess we're supposed to think it's cute this time? What purpose could these sadistic torturer speed-dating sequences sequences possibly have, except to establish that both sides are cocks? And the Schmorth Scmoreans at least have better hygiene. I don't know, doesn't seem like Korth Norea can run the place any worse. The problem is, or rather the first problem on the dizzying pile I prepared for today, is that while the whole alt-universe thing asks us to mentally disassociate from the North Korea we're familiar with, we're simultaneously asked to root for America based on our knowledge of the real world version, rather than the deadbeat nation-wide slum presented for us here. Anyway, the People's Republic of Chorea call in the debt, occupy and enslave the US, and you're part of a guerilla resistance movement to take the country back. Dancing a twelve foot radius around it is just undignified. Guys, if you want the villains to be China, just make the villains China. In Homefront world, North Korea is a global center of tech manufacturing, and the US is cripplingly indebted to it. It's actually called Homefront: The Revolution. Incidentally, well done for using the single most overused subtitle you fucking- Oh, hang on, my mistake.
The first Homefront was a linear shooter about as worth committing to memory as the lyrics to Agadoo, and Homefront: Revolution seems barely connected at all.
I feel like the starting point must have been a slightly creepy desire to kill North Koreans, and then they had to tortuously contrive a scenario in which the conflict wasn't totally unfair. But if you're gonna make alt-North Korea so wildly different to the real world equivalent, then why even call it North Korea? Call it Bastardstan, or Spermany.
#Homefront the revolution characters cracker#
Oh but it's alright, it's an alternative universe North Korea, that found a whole bunch of money and military tech in a Christmas cracker or something, and now wants to muscle a considerably weaker country on the other side of the world, for no adequate reason. The contemporary shooter hinging on the ever so slightly barmy premise that North Korea could be a credible threat, rather than the national equivalent of a talkative Counter-Strike player. Well, here's a franchise I never thought would have the balls to show its face around these parts again - Homefront. This week, Zero Punctuation reviews Homefront: The Revolution.
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